So my husband is home again, and predictably I was so thrilled to get him back that I totally forgot to tell the internet about it.
Naturally, having him home again required some adjustment on my part
(I’m in bed, snuggled diagonally across and using his pillow)
HIM: Move over
HIM: Move over! I need to get in and I want to use MY pillow!
ME: (moving) FINE! Sheesh, I don’t know why you’re complaining about this NOW… you didn’t have a problem with me sleeping like this all week!
HIM: Wait… was that all just a setup? (laughs harder)
ME: (proud) Yup. I pulled a you. You’re right, that’s fun!
So I slept for a few days, clinging to my man like a limpet and insisting that he spend far more time in bed than was reasonable, and we eased back into our usual rhythm, complete with the snoring and the sleep-talking.
HIM: Did I fall asleep?
ME: Well, I kept waking you up with kisses to get you to stop snoring…. so, yes.
HIM: No, the correct answer was, “for a little while.”
ME: (cue Sarcastic Eyebrow™)
HIM: And I don’t snore.
But I really felt like the family was back together Saturday morning, when I had to wake up at a hellish hour to get animals taken care of before people came to pick up the foster dog. I am, as we’ve previously mentioned, not a morning person. Me waking up looks less like Sleeping Beauty and more like a vampire with a paper route. So I need a little extra help getting out of bed when there’s not a medical, urgent, need to do so. Naturally, when my alarm went off, Husband helped out by rolling over and snuggling/pinning me. I hit the snooze twice and then got serious.
ME: Are you going to get up and help me with the dogs?
ME: I can’t tell if that’s a yeah or a hell no
ME: (smack) are you going to help me with the dogs or not?
ME: (realizing he could bend that either way) I need to know which. Are you helping me or staying in bed?
ME: God dammit, are you getting up to help me?
HIM: …. Yeah.
ME: (flops back, groaning)
HIM: It’s not MY fault you ask the wrong questions!