Worse Than Clowns


I haven’t seen IT yet, and it’s Husband’s fault.


Louis CK is confused


Trevor Noah's thoughtful face




Why are you still here?  Are… are you doubting me?


Tom Hanks "Really?"



But you know he lives to crush my dreams!  Remember the haunted boat tour?  Or basically anything else to do with boats?*


Remember how he refuses to partake of the Halloween magic with me?


Right, so now I’m stuck trying to see it with someone else.   Only nobody was free last weekend, so I’m waiting and hoping I don’t have to go watch the scary clown alone.


Naturally he was no help whatsoever.




ME:  IT is out.
HIM:  Yup.  You should go see it with K.
ME:  (already texting K)  … Yeah.  So, am I right that you’d never see that with me?
HIM:  Correct.
ME:  Because you’re a meanie poopie.
HIM:  (sighs)  Maybe your son will take you to see it in 20 years when  they do another remake.
ME:  (freezes)
HIM:  …
ME:  Yeah, ‘cuz that’s what I want—virtual reality clowns.
HIM:  Then you should probably go see it in 20 years; this one would be a disappointment.
ME:  (twitching)
HIM:  Oh, you were being sarcastic.
ME:  (already walking away)  I’m leaving you!
HIM:  (laughs)


Janeane Garofalo eyeroll and walk away








* I’ve just checked, and that’s a whole ‘nother dream he crushed that I totally forgot to tell you about.  Remind me, k?





17 comments on “Worse Than Clowns

  1. Lisa Orchard says:

    Ha! Ha! I want to see that one, too and I know hubby won’t go with me…but I have friends who are into the horror stuff so it’s all good!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Michelle says:

    I wish we were close to each other, I would see it with you. I don’t think Randy will go either, so I’ll end up going with my sister.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. LittleFears says:

    Haha! Oh man I want to see IT! I haven’t been to the cinema in… At least 10 years? Heh.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Between shitty converted 3D and weird seats, it’s not the experience it used to be.

      Pretty sure they’re still using the same popcorn, though.

      You know what I love? I’m a sucker for a drive-in. There are still a very few of them operating in the US, and it’s our rare opportunity to take the dogs with us to a movie. (crap food is better if you’re sharing it with grateful hounds)


  4. I can’t get The Viking to go to a movie in a theatre unless it actually has a Viking in it. So, even if I wanted to see IT – which I don’t because that shit gives me nightmares! – I would need approximately 23 women OR 38 men to help me get him into the car. And then it would be a constant monologue of parking complaints, price complaints, lack of availability of Danish licorice complaints, seating complaints, the sheer number of pre-movie advertisement complaints, volume complaints, why I need so many napkin complaints, his soda has too many ice-cubes complaints, the popcorn has too much salt complaints, there’s too many people trying to get out of the theatre at the same time complaints and then the ultimate complaint that it was a total waste of good money that should have been spent on something constructive rather than a stupid fucking movie.

    Instead, I sit very close to the TV, turn it up too loud and eat microwave popcorn. I know it doesn’t sound great but The Viking sits at the back of the room where I don’t have to listen to his complaints. :o)

    Geezus…..I should have just written a post about this. I had no idea how many pent up emotions I have about theatres. Or The Viking, as far as that goes.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I’ve talked my partner into going with me tomorrow, but apparently it has to be a daytime screening.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Lutheranliar says:

    Hmmm. Wish I could help you out here, but I hate clowns almost as much as I hate boats. Though I DO love Stephen King. Quandary.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Hah that conversation is similar to me and my husband with thrill rides (with drops) ;D. Hopefully you get to see it! It’s honestly not that scary in my opinion. Have you seen the original mini series or read the novel?

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Personally, I totally creeped out just thinking about that movie. Best of luck and sleep tight 😉

    Liked by 1 person

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