You guys, I’m so lonely.
Calm down, I’m still married! Jeez, panic much? It’s just that, on my off days (non-haunting days, you know) I’m keeping my spirits up* by imbibing all the seasonally appropriate media I can cram into my day. Or night.
Husband, as you all know, does not participate in this.
ME: Stay and cuddle with me!
HIM: No, you’re going to watch things I don’t like.
ME: I’m going to watch Halloween-appropriate things.
ME: And you object to everything about this season? Seriously? You can’t think of anything seasonally appropriate that you like?
HIM: … Candy.
ME: … You want me to watch a show about… candy?
HIM: No, I want to eat candy.
ME: You can eat candy! Sit down and eat candy and we’ll watch Gerald’s Game!
HIM: It’ll be more authentic if I leave you to it alone.
ME: (glares) It’ll be most authentic if you have a heart attack and a dog eats your face.
DOG: (looks uncomfortable with the turn this conversation has taken)
Ohmygodyouguys. Did you see Gerald’s Game? If you didn’t, I give you permission to click off my blog—just this once—to go do that immediately. I was skeptical when I saw the first trailers, because I loved the book** and I could see some changes had been made (uh… why is he her inner voice?) but then I remembered that some things need to be changed when we switch to a visual medium and gave it a chance. 99.98%*** of the changes were absolutely the correct choice and I don’t even care that they were made.
HIM: (brings me bottle of water)
ME: Thank you. Sure you won’t stay?
HIM: (already leaving) Positive!
ME: But look! (points at paused screen) The Space Cowboy is about to show up!
HIM: (stops dead) Space cowboy? What the hell is this?
ME: Well, some people call him that. Some call him the Gangster of Love.
HIM: (comes closer) What?
ME: (unpauses) See? In the corner.
HIM: What is that?
ME: (huffs) The Space Cowboy. I said.
HIM: (turns) I’m leaving.
HIM: You know, some people call him Maurice.
ME: Not in this movie!
** Devoured it in one sitting and was so affected by it that at one point I pulled myself out because I was getting dehydrated, looked up to see a glass of iced tea sitting on my window sill where I had set it, and nearly wept because it was out of reach. Yeah. (Just realized that only makes sense if you’ve read the book or know the story, but seriously, that should be everyone by now. Catch the fuck up.)
*** This post is named for the two things that bothered me enough to mention.