Attempts to prove that I am not the central point around which everything in the universe revolves were undermined recently when my city built me a bridge for my birthday.
It’s right by my house, too.
They even announced, weeks in advance, that the road under the bridge would be closed on my birthday and the day before—you know, for the birthday bridge building. Sort of killed the surprise aspect but I’m not mad because it’s a bridge, you know? Not like they were gonna sneak it in while I was sleeping.
Although… they did manage to get rid of the old one without my notice.
ME: There’s not even a pile of not a bridge anymore; they just *boop* took it.
ME: Still got the pillars, if you want one.
HIM: … Not sure what we’d do with it…
ME: Oh, I have plans.
HIM: … Or how we’d get it home.
HIM: I can’t carry it, and your pockets are too small.
Don’t worry: Husband hasn’t been outdone by the city. Because his gifts actually showed up on time, and the fucking bridge still isn’t finished.
ME: Where’s my birthday bridge?
HIM: They’ve got the beams up!
ME: That’s not a bridge.
HIM: Well they’ve closed off—
ME: Lemme stop you right there. Because I don’t care where else they’re building bridges right now—that was my birthday bridge.
HIM: It’s still your birthday!
Does it seem like he’s getting better at handling me?