ǝpᴉsuI ǝzᴉɹԀ

 

Hey, let’s do that thing where I tell you about a thing that happened and you tell me* who was right, who was wrong, and who should be ashamed of their actions that day.**

 

Tracy Morgan "I would like to do that, please"

 

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Laugh and He Laughs Alone

 

First off, before I even start, I have to confess that I pester Husband about this blog.  It’s not required reading or anything, but I know he reads so I like to know the very instant he’s read a post so I can get his feedback. 

 

 

"I'm sittin' in my cahir, relaxing, getting blackout drunk, and you're leaving me alone" (from Always Sunny in Philadelphia)

Poor him… not how it goes down.

 

Which, yeah, maybe sounds annoying.  But I do it for yoooouuu!

 

Because sometimes, y’all, his feedback is just so… so exactly what this blog is for that I have to share it with you.

 

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Volumptuous Peeohple

 

I feel like this is the season for bonding, so I’m going to tell you an important step to going from Acquaintance, Person I Like, or Person Who Is Allowed to Buy Me Coffee to WE ARE FRIENDS NOW.

 

 

You gotta be willing to hate along with me.  And you’ve got to be on board with my reasons.

 

Mean Girls "you may think you like someone, but you could be wrong

 

Now, this is not a requirement for fans, so if your goal is to continue to read my blogs and have me love you to bits for reading the words that I blurt out into the ether, don’t stress this next bit. But if you want to actually sit next to me while I drink that coffee, or really just keep up with my in-person conversations?

 

Yeah, this is a thing.

 

This is how my friend Audrey learned the rule:

 

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Thoughts From The Shower

 

Technically, these are random thoughts from my morning bathroom trance.  But that sounded weird and gross and vaguely pervy in a bad way. 

 

creepy Bugs Bunny suited adult invites you to share his toilet seat

 

 

I’d go with Thoughts From the Bathtub (which Jenna Marbles already made famous, so half the work’s already done for me, right?) but I hate baths too much; they’re gross, and I can’t even pretend to enjoy soaking in mostly water.*

 

The 8 Stages of a Bath (getting gross)

 

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Finishing Each Other’s Sandwiches

 

I complain about him a lot, and I write about us fighting or shouting at each other a lot—partly because I honestly believe these things are vital to a healthy marriage, but also because they’re more entertaining than two people who snuggle and agree and say “I love you” over and over.

 

 

gross pus-dribbling Jeff Goldblum from The Fly saying "That's disgusting"

 

 

But then stuff like this happens, and I realize that I need to show you this side of our marriage sometimes.  If for no other reason than to model the correct technique for interrupting your partner.

 

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