You deserve a real post—two real posts—this week.


But Offspring is home, and I’ve got to go wake him up by bouncing on his bed and asking what he wants to do today.


I really want to brag about the things I got Husband for Christmas, but he reads this blog so it’ll have to wait.  And I can’t tell you about the adorable thing we got Offspring because—though I’ve warned him off—he insists on reading this blog.[1]


And I live in St Louis, a city that just completely lost its shit over two inches of snow.[2]

meme: girl in raincoat rushing off with milk and bread; text reads: "I JUST SAW A SNOW FLAKE"


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ONGOING Drama, Confidential


If you’re anything like my husband, you’re getting sick of all the turtle talk[1] and ready for a change of subject. Thus it is time to address, in that sideways fashion reserved for ongoing legal dramas, The Other Thing.[2]


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I’d Rather Have a Springbok


We are here, you will recall, to discuss The Bug issue. 

looping gif, endless parade of giant beetles marches by


Well, not “discuss” in the traditional format, obviously; you are there and I am here and there’s a temporal disconnect as well.  More “discuss” in the book club sense; I’ll tell you a story, and then maybe we’ll have a discussion question at the end.  Won’t that be fun?


Shut up, it’s better than working.  And if you’re not reading on your employer’s time it’s not my fault.


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Volumptuous Peeohple


I feel like this is the season for bonding, so I’m going to tell you an important step to going from Acquaintance, Person I Like, or Person Who Is Allowed to Buy Me Coffee to WE ARE FRIENDS NOW.



You gotta be willing to hate along with me.  And you’ve got to be on board with my reasons.


Mean Girls "you may think you like someone, but you could be wrong


Now, this is not a requirement for fans, so if your goal is to continue to read my blogs and have me love you to bits for reading the words that I blurt out into the ether, don’t stress this next bit. But if you want to actually sit next to me while I drink that coffee, or really just keep up with my in-person conversations?


Yeah, this is a thing.


This is how my friend Audrey learned the rule:


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